On a Personal Note…
“Art means nothing if it simply decorates the dinner table of the power that holds it hostage.” - Adrienne Rich
Like so many artists, I spent the first half of my career being whatever I was hired to be… a character… in someone else’s show. They owned my time, my likeness, my voice, my sleep, and my instincts in exchange for money. Ironically, I had decided early on that money meant freedom, but when I realized my freedom was inherent, I noticed how difficult it was to claim and actively live my life in honor of that freedom no matter how much money or success was at stake. This is a lesson I continue to grapple with.
It’s largely unconscious, this idea that we need approval for everything, and that our creativity is not worth standing behind especially if what we have to express offends or challenges, but those delusions are there in all of us, and often powerfully ingrained.
Culturally, now more than ever, we can see the negative impact of pointing the blame for our unhappiness outside of ourselves causing massive divides and destructive victim narratives. Functioning society seems almost contingent on our disempowerment which is why throughout history some of our greatest artists have similar stories of either isolating or running away from their original families or communities to seek freedom. However, the role of the artist, I now understand, is actually crucial to human evolution and essential to the communities we naturally challenge.
The hardest thing to do is to remember our birthright to freedom within an oppressive system. If we continue to trust ourselves as we shine and elevate our communities, our families, work environments, in spite of the probability of being outcasted or even attacked for the truths our brightest lights tend to reveal… we will find both ourselves and our sense of belonging right where we are at all times.
Since becoming pregnant with my daughter, I’ve had one foot in television while the other is building my own business, cultivating skills, discovering what sets my services and interests apart, questioning current industry standards, developing the confidence to prioritize my vision, learning to communicate my truth kindly, collaborating with artists and administrators I believe in, letting go of what and who doesn’t align gracefully, holding space for misunderstandings to resolve themselves in time, and trusting it all to come together in a way that can sustain my career in harmony with my creative and personal life as it is, where it is, no matter what my circumstances may be or where I might be called.
Over my two decades acting in a string of non-stop series regular roles, and living all over the world, I would make sure to invest in my own art, music, writing, business skills, my own home, my community of dear and true friends and collaborators, but it felt… sly. It felt like I had to either run or hide from the industry in order to honor, explore, and express who I really was. I worried that if the industry sensed I wasn’t its slave, I would be tossed aside for someone more appeasing. However impossible it seemed, every time I ran (which was often, I left home in Canada quite young, got kicked out of my first college program for skipping school to travel, I left 4 top agents and managers at different times in my career, stopped talking to my family of origin at times) but something always called me back to my longing for stability, my loyalty to love, my compulsion to forgive, and my relentless hope to have a home and a family that valued freedom, to remain Canadian while becoming American, a citizen of the world even, and to be an independent artist and mother with a secured place in this seemingly all-powerful entertainment industry while also rebelling against it.
So I quietly built inner security and outer security, and gently turned the ship around from pursuing external validation to searching for deep connection with my soul and soul tribe. I would ask myself: What about my life, just the way it is, truly brings me joy? How can I nurture that joy and offer it to the world? That is when it became clear to me that it was time for me to write, direct, and produce my first feature... literally and entirely from home.
In Her Name is a liberation story, not just for me, but I believe for everyone involved which is where my passion lies. I stand for finding personal freedom within the family unit, within the community, and within the systems that protect us and work for us. I aim to stay connected while holding space for the freedom required to create meaningful work. I have learned the power of loving with an open palm. This is difficult to exemplify as we associate our freedom with individuality and independence, but for filmmaking especially, it is an extremely interdependent process that requires individual freedom. When the opportunity to collaborate with Erin Hammond and Ciera Danielle arose, it was the first time in my life I felt brave enough to go all in and risk testing my faith in art.
Still today, there is a part of me that feels I have to keep up appearances in order to survive. Even now as a writer, director, and producer, I catch myself concerned that my agents, managers, lawyers, fans, collaborators, and investors continue to see me as a commodity. I feel I have to drop my personal interests in favor of meetings, auditions, and opportunities for hire above all else. I have to pay my dues, commissions of up to 40% sometimes. But finally, thanks to my first film being out in the world… a pure vision manifest… an answer to no one but the call… a film that holds indescribable magic and a story that moves and connects people with their humanity, I feel more responsible than ever for my understanding of what it takes to be an artist… and to value it.
Cheshire Moon Productions is committed to creating works that reflect the journey home to self and soul. The creations and experiences we provide serve to be a reminder of who we all are uniquely and as a whole. We believe in investing in genius artists who have been outcast and help them succeed and feel less alone.
The road ahead is long, but after decades of seeking, this film is my first work of art that has achieved substantial results outside of industry ownership… even our distribution deal with Tribeca Films, Giant Pictures, and Drafthouse allowed me to maintain full rights, which is unheard of.
The In Her Name Blu-Ray available on Amazon includes more on The Making Of story. I hope it leaves you inspired and that you share your review online to encourage as many people as possible to see it.
Words can’t thank you enough.
~ S ~
Sarah Carter, CEO
